Thursday, July 23, 2009

The old and the new

I've been looking over my old posts from My Space-- here is one of my favorites in personal growth:

That date won't own me
Current mood: pensive
Category: Life
There are anniversaries in our lives, some good, some bad and I am blessed and cursed with a terrific memory. Some of it because I replay things in my head over and over but mostly just because I was given that gift.
It's a gift because I can recall things with better than 90% accuracy though I do not have a photographic memory.
Cursed because I forget almost nothing, but it does happen, sure I do forget things. Where did I put my car keys? Yeah, I'm human...
But the point of this is, when bad things happen, I tend to remember the date. This happened to me on November 19th...on March 31st...and then the anniversaries happen. I had a friend who is no longer a friend basically encourage and reinforce this behavior in me. She did a version of the same thing.
Recently I have decided to not let those dates own me. I don't celebrate those horrid (and they are truly traumatically horrid) things happening to me and should not be forced to re-live them and torture myself with. I refuse to let those dates own me. The fact is, those things are not happening to me on this day NOW and I have learned what I need to learn from those terrible things and now I won't let them own me.
From now on I will celebrate the wonderful anniversaries and not give room to the traumatic anniversaries. It isn't like I will ever forget those things happened but I can't undo them and should not continue to torture myself. If I happen to think of it, I have simply moved on with my day, telling myself I don't have room in my life for that negative energy any more.
Yes, that date doesn't own me.

1 comment:

Jessica @ Acting Adult said...

Hey! I'm glad you started a blog! :)

Check out mine... it should be listed below!